WWE sure has come up with some strange PPV event names over the years…
From the moment it was announced fans began speculating what the name of WWE’s Cardiff’s pay-per-view, sorry, “Premium Live Event” was going to be called.
Will it have something to do with Dragons? Valleys? Leaks? Some even speculated a “SummerSlam part 2.” Those people have clearly never been to Wales, where summer doesn’t really exist.
What we got was “Clash At The Castle.”
Quite an underwhelming title, but at least it kind of makes sense, as the event will take place less than a mile away from Cardiff Castle.
It is also not as bad as these previous event names that somehow managed to wiggle their way through past the conceptual stage.
Taboo Tuesday
A PPV being held on a Tuesday wasn’t quite awkward enough, so WWE decided to double down by giving it the odd moniker “Taboo Tuesday.”
Here is the Cambridge definition of the word Taboo.
“A subject, word, or action that is avoided for religious or social reasons:”
In this society, there is a taboo on/against any sort of public display of affection.
He would not hesitate to break any taboo.
So what taboos were precisely broken? The show allowed fans to vote for match stipulations online. Was giving people what they want to be considered taboo?
Also Taboo is just straight up a funny word. Say it slowly. TABOOOOOOOOO.
The concept only lasted a couple of years before it was moved to the weekend and renamed Cyber Sunday.
The saucy ones among us who remember the early days of the world wide web would know that “cyber” was slang for naughty chat room messaging.
Now that would have certainly broken some taboos.
The Greatest Royal Rumble
There was a period when WWE decided to give matches and events an extra bit of hyperbole by adding the word “greatest.”
Remember at Backlash a couple of years ago when Edge and Randy Orton were set to face each other in “The Greatest Wrestling Match Ever!” No pressure, lads.
The same goes for 2018’s “The Greatest Royal Rumble”
First of all, it had to differentiate itself from the traditional Royal Rumble, as that took place at, well, the Royal Rumble.
It also had the stipulation of 50 people competing, as opposed to the usual 30, so it was certainly the biggest Royal Rumble.
How about calling it the “Super Rumble?” or the “Ultra Rumble?” or “The Royal Rumble: Turbo” or some other variant of a Street Fighter title?
The Greatest Royal Rumble just sounded a little bit childish, as if infants in a playground were making dream fantasy bookings. It’s only a few steps away from “DA BESTEST WOYAL WUMBLE EVAAAAR”
Sadly, winner Braun Strowman didn’t go on to face the champion at “The Most Awesome WrestleMania!”
The Horror Show At Extreme Rules
Extreme Rules in 2020 was weird. Heck, every WWE event in 2020 was weird, with the Thunder Dome giving us a taste of what a dystopian wrestling event would look like.
The name “ThunderDome” even comes from Mad Max 3, a movie set in an apocalyptic wasteland!
Anyway, even before the Orwellian landscape of grinning faces from controlled computer screens, WWE was making wacky decisions, and a show which featured bizarre sights like Seth Rollins ripping out Rey Mysterio’s eye deserved an equally bizarre name.
The Horror Show wasn’t a sub-title, like Extreme Rules: The Horror Show. It was part of the full name. The Horror Show At Extreme Rules.
The wordy title kind of gives the impression that The Horror Show was a side performance outside the main circus tent of Extreme Rules. Or even better than that, the WWE superstars were going to perform Richard O’Brien’s classic musical The Rocky Horror Show… to the extreme!
A megalomaniac who has “been making a man with blonde hair and a tan.” Dr Frank-N-Furter or Vince in the 80s during the rise of Hulkamania? You decide.
Crown Jewel
At first, this title might not sound too bizarre. The event did take place in the kingdom of Saudi Arabia after all.
The thing is, after extensive research (a quick look on Google) the king of Saudi Arabia doesn’t have a crown, let alone one with jewels in it. Not to public knowledge anyway.
Maybe the title is referring to the event itself, that it is a substitute for Saudi Arabia’s lack of golden hat.
After two annual events, WWE was forced to take a year out in 2020 for what should be obvious reasons.
Perhaps it was during that time someone realized the show name didn’t make that much sense, and when the event returned it played host to both the King Of The Ring and inaugural Queen’s Crown tournament, allowing some justification for the royal headwear handle.
Great Balls Of Fire
As if there was any doubt, the top spot in this list has to go to Great Balls Of Fire.
It’s a wonder how this name made it so far to become a header for a show. “Great Balls of Fire” isn’t a common phrase used in day to day life (unless you’re someone who is constantly stunned when eating at hibachi restaurants), let alone one that would connect with modern audiences.
It’s most commonly associated with a random sixty-year-old song performed by a man with a dubious reputation.
The show might as well be called “Blue Suede Shoes,” or “Tutti Frutti” or “Ring Of Fire”
Actually, that last one isn’t so bad. At least it has the word ring in the title. Makes more sense than BALLS of fire anyway.
And let’s be honest, no event should have the word BALLS in its title.
It should be taken for granted that us wrestling fans, who spent hard earned money on merchandise featuring all sorts of rude phrases and double entendres in the late 90s/early 00s, aren’t really mature enough to not giggle when an announcer or commentator says the phrase GREAT BALLS OF FIRE with gusto.
Was that the point? A PG attempt at some low-key, low-brow humour?
Either way, someone came up with that title, and many more agreed with it.
Maybe the name Clash At The Castle isn’t so bad after all, eh?